Stop Nagging. Start Empowering.

If you feel like a broken record reminding your teen what to do (again and again), you’re not alone. And more importantly, you’re not doing anything wrong.

Teens with ADHD do need more reminders than most—but the key is in how those reminders are delivered.

Verbal reminders often backfire. Why?

• Weak working memory makes it hard to retain what was just said.

• Slow processing and distraction mean they may not even hear you.

• And thanks to individuation, they’re actively trying to prove they don’t need you telling them what to do.

The result? Your helpful reminders often land as criticism. That’s where systems come in.

💡 Here are 3 ways to reduce your reminders (without increasing the stress):

1. Establish a collaborative daily routine
   Predictable routines wire the ADHD brain for success and decrease the need for prompting. Bonus: Teens start to feel more independent, which boosts buy-in.

2. Replace words with visual systems
   Post-it reminders and time-blocking notebooks work because they’re not you. Written systems depersonalize the reminders and reduce emotional reactivity.

3. Scaffold until the habit sticks
   The secret? Don’t set it and forget it. Co-create the system. Check it together. Praise effort, not just outcomes. Pull back when they hit 80% consistency.

🧠 “We don’t rise to the level of our goals—we fall to the level of our systems.” – James Clear

In my coaching work with teens and families, I see this transformation happen all the time. When the right systems are in place—and practiced consistently—nagging disappears, and teens actually begin to thrive.

If you want to help your teen become more independent and confident while reducing the power struggles at home, these tools aren’t optional. They’re essential.